It's been a while since I've updated my blog with substantive writing. Truth is, I had written fresh blog entries no fewer than 5 times, only to have them deleted. There are some things that I still feel uncomfortable yelling about - no matter how few people read this blog. Yet, yell I must, and it is with some reluctance that I set out my beliefs on the matter without letting too much away.

What could possibly be so private that I cannot set them down into writing? One word. Religion.

I personally think I'm going to Hell for the reason that I disagree with so much of the dogma that is espoused by organised Christianity. It of course begs the question why I -believe- in Hell in the first place. The answer is simple - I believe in God, I know I'm a disobedient christian, yet there are many aspects to my life that I have questioned and found myself or other Christians lacking in the ability to answer.

One of these questions of dogma has recently plagued a good friend of mine. It had plagued my life in the past and left me less of a Christian. I fully understand what he must be going through, and respect the fact that it's a problem that he must sort out for himself. I pray that he will not come to the same conclusion I have - for I know it is his faith that makes him a good person, and I would not see that ruined no matter how little personal respect I have for that particular bit of dogma.

Friend, if you are reading this, always remember that I respect your beliefs even if I don't believe in them myself. You've earned it.

As a side note, I have no doubts that persons reading this blog would seek to clarify my doubts. My response is this - I will not be more specific than saying my relationship with Christians had contributed to the ruining of my relationship with God. I have no desire to see my point being proven yet again.